This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
