i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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