Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
My balls are so social today.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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