i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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