fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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