i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
