i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize