How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
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