Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
now i know why i became what i already was.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I just googled if crying burns calories
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
