hotel room ftw
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
