so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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