she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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