I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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