I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
