end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
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