Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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