I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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