we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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