is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize