so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
