Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
