the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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