Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize