yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
