Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
