Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
