so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
