Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Randomize
