good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
