you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
