Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
