i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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