So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
