Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
