just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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