If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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