i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize