happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Randomize
