Non-Jews are for practice
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Randomize
