We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
