It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Randomize
