let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
