You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
