i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
