go do what you do best...puke behind churches
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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