After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
please come you make the beer taste better
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
