when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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