his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
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