She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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