Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
