We're facebook friends in real life
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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