Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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