He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
